I was in an abusive relationship for 7 months, not physical but my ex called me all kinds of nasty names. I finally got out of it thanks to support of my co-worker and we both developed strong feelings for each other. He never ever gave me a reason to not trust him. He supported me on everything. Last night, he came to my house and we had a few drinks. He started to fall asleep on my couch and his phone rung. It was a girl, it was midnight. I panicked. All I could think was he was just gonna hurt me like my ex and I asked him who she was? It was a girl I had no idea who she was calling him at midnight. I might have overreacted and approached him about it the wrong way. Here these 2 were friends for over 13 years, I apologized over and over again, told him I shouldn’t have let my insecurities get the best of me. We have never ever fought. We had a pretty good relationship up until this. Now he won’t even talk to me. He knew going in all the abuse my ex put me through, so why won’t he communicate with me about this? Should I have never asked who she was or was I ok for asking? We are dating btw
It all depends on how you reacted when his female friend called. If you overacted by flipping out on him then yes you scared him off. If you simply asked him, “who is this person calling you at midnight” in a calm tone, then it is okay. Honestly, he may not have liked the fact that you are questioning who is calling him. Remember, you two are just dating and he doesn’t need to report to you who he speaks to on the phone.
I think it’s perfectly fine that you asked him who was calling him at midnight. You’ve already apologized for your actions. He needs to forgive you and move on from the incident. If you see that he is still not speaking to you, then I say forget him! No need to chase someone that is not willing to forgive you for a minor mishap.