This weekend I was out of town. My boyfriend called me a total of 94 times and texted me about 150 times. Most of those calls, I was not able to answer. I was helping out family and watching a 2- and 6-year-old for 14 hours straight. When I did talk to him and explained to him that he was emotionally exhausting, he then started to cry telling me how I don’t care about him. I was so angry and pissed off at him! I haven’t been able to snap out of it. I’m planning on breaking up with him when I’m financially able to. Side note, my boyfriend took out a loan in my name and didn’t cancel it once I found out. Needless to say, I’m depressed 24/7. I constantly walk on eggshells when I’m around him. I constantly lie to my friends about the state of our relationship. Some have noticed how he excessively calls when I’m out with them. If something goes on with his family, car troubles, emergency situations, or just about any little thing he will call me multiple times with updates. Point being, am I a jerk for being fed up with his emotional unstableness and getting angry/frustrated? What do I do until then?
Wow, dealing with a boyfriend like that can be mentally exhausting! You shouldn’t have to put up with such behavior, even if there’s a loan involved. It’s essential not to project your anger or frustrations onto him, but it’s also crucial to recognize that this kind of constant calling and texting, over 100 times a day, is not healthy. It sounds like your boyfriend might have some co-dependent tendencies, and being in an enmeshed relationship can be quite challenging.
If you want to salvage your relationship, couples therapy could be a valuable option to explore. It can help you both address these issues and find healthier ways to communicate and relate to each other. Remember, you deserve a relationship that respects your boundaries and allows for emotional well-being. Don’t hesitate to seek support if needed, for the sake of your own happiness and relationship health.